My intention was to write a few posts on prayer during the month of September, but life got in the way. Getting to the computer to write is at times a battle I just can’t win. But I have made prayer a focus as much as I could in my own life this past month. Maybe I should call it a blurry instead of a focus, because while I was looking that direction, I couldn’t always tell what I was looking at.
But then such is my journey towards God. I try to be always moving closer to Him, but sometimes I am more stumbling that direction than running into His arms.
Often in times like these, when the complexities of life make my way towards Him slow going, He sends me a song. A song to give me the words to pray, or to remind me why I am here, where I am going, and who He is. This time He called my attention to Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing (I have the version on Born to Worship
Hitherto Thy love has blest me, thou hast brought me to this place,
And I know Thy hand will lead me, safely home by thy good grace.
It was a good reminder for me that God has put me here, to do this work set before me. He knows I am desiring His will and His closeness. Being frustrated for lack of time and focus is part of where I am now. He has asked me to walk around and around Jericho, even though walking in circles doesn’t at first appear to get me any closer to Him.
A few years ago we had a house fire. It was a life changing experience and a very traumatic thing to live through. My sixth child was three weeks old at the time. My two oldest children were in a charter school and I was homeschooling the rest. To say I was overwhelmed is an understatement. One night, in my postpartum haze, I cried out to God while nursing my little baby to sleep. I begged Him for perspective. I felt like I was overreacting to small things and entirely missing the things that were really important. I just couldn’t seem to balance it all out in my head. So I sat there and nursed and cried and prayed.
The next morning at around 7:30am, my house caught fire. Let me tell you, I acquired perspective very quickly!
I didn’t blame God for my fire, but I did think it was pretty suspicious that I had prayed for perspective and gotten a house fire out of the deal. It took me several years to understand that the house fire was just that – a house fire. The gift I received was that right before it, God brought me to a place where I would understand and be receptive to some very important things He was trying to tell me. Like the lyrics in the song, “Hitherto Thy love has blest me, thou hast brought me to this place.”
Right now that place He has brought me to is filled with the pitter patter of little feet and little time for quiet prayer. For now I have to work and fight for every moment I can get. But that is not so bad. It certainly keeps me on my toes.
While this doesn’t have my favorite verse, this is a good video version of the song. Full lyrics here, I have been listening to the third one down.